Written by Jonathan Wojcik with the aid of With the Will, Digimon Wiki and Wikimon


NUMEMON X

OHHH MY GOD YEAH. YEAH!!! I CAN'T BELIEVE I USED UP MY "FUCK YEAH'S" YESTERDAY!!! I'm gonna need some different swears! Holy SHITBALLS! I can't believe one of the trashblobs finally got in on X-evolution, I can't believe how much I like it even more than its basis and I can't believe I like a brand new 2019 Digimon as much as I love Raremon!! This is pretty much exactly how I'd have wanted a Numemon X to go down! The switch from green to pink looks great, the nasty sharp teeth look great, the fleshy eyestalks formed from an otherwise metallic "X" symbol look great, and of course the swarming baby slugs! SWARMING BABY SLUGS!!! Those are actually born from the sheer overwhelming filthiness of Numemon X, and it hurls them at its enemies along with its disgusting rancid feces! Wait...I mean its SHIT! We're cussing now, remember?! Mephismon X made me cuss!!!

That thing on X-antibody Numemon's tongue is an actual "X-antibody," which it likes to flaunt wherever it goes, but apparently Numemon X is just so gross and the antibody so caked in gross shitty slug drool that nothing ever dares to steal it.

X-Numemon's bio states that, despite appearances, it is a "caring" and "courageous" Digimon that will put its life on the line to protect those it cares about, which is definitely a callback to the portrayal of Numemon in the original anime as suicidally selfless despite living in a sewer and eating shit all day.

The only thing that disappoints me here is the same thing that always disappointed me about digimon: that this is only an adult stage, besides also being an X-form. I still just want a digimon game to have not only all of them, but reason to use whatever Digimon you want at whatever evolutionary level they may be. The only other possibility I can hope for is that, some day, they'll make a Platinumnumemon X that I'll like even half as much as this perfect angel.

Numemon X is also, if you hadn't noticed, our 365th digimon review, which means you can now read a single one of my digimon reviews every single day of the year and always, always end that year on one of the best things ever in the whole wide world.

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