Design + Art by Margret Storm

Music: splatterhouse 3 - Bore Worm Boss

L??? FINAL JAYSLOB ATTACKS!



FINAL JAYSLOB:

ssshhHhHhssssHSHSHshshshsh!!!!


CHOOSE YOUR ACTIONS!

FERN (L11) - ATK:6



WILLIS (L15) - ATK:0




>POLYP, DRINK

FERN UNLEASHED THE RAMBLIN' EVIL COLORECTAL POLYP!

The obnoxious little tumor guy has proven oddly insightful thus far...


RAMBLIN' EVIL COLORECTAL POLYP:

Hoo boy, that's a load'a colons, and none of 'em too pretty. This thing's fairly big, but it's also fairly broken. It can barely move without tearing itself up, so whatever it can do is gonna come with some recoil issues. Definitely not the kind of body I'd feel safe riding around in.


WILLIS USED DRINK!

STRIKE ROLL: 11 (HIT!)

Arteries fly from Willis's tiny body, branching and arcing like a bolt of electricity into the meat of the shuddering monstrosity.


FINAL JAYSLOB LOSES 1/4 CURRENT HP (ROUNDED DOWN!) TO WILLIS!




WILLIS GAINED 9 HEALTH!

Mmm-mm!! This one's REAL salty!!!

+


The monster rears back, soft flesh squelching and broken bones rattling like a thousand castanet players in a mud wrestling contest.
FINAL JAYSLOB USED BROKEN BASH

STRIKE ROLL: 10+10 (HIT!)

DAMAGE ROLL: 9, 10, 6, 11, 15, 19, 17, 17 (4 DAMAGE!)


WILLIS LOSES 4 HEALTH!

OOF!!!

+


FINAL JAYSLOB SUFFERS RECOIL DAMAGE!





>STONE, SHIELD

WILLIS USED SHIELD!

Willis surrounds FERN in a tough, rubbery basket of arteries. All damage inflicted by or upon Willis and Fern reduced to ONE this turn!


FERN UNLEASHED THE BABY KIDNEY STONE!




Kidney Stone inflicts one damage per turn on all opponents!




FINAL JAYSLOB SUFFERS 1 KIDNEY DAMAGE!




FINAL JAYSLOB USED BROKEN BASH ON FERN!

STRIKE ROLL: 6+10 (HIT!)

DAMAGE ROLL: 4, 3, 10, 11, 20, 16, 15, 19 (5 DAMAGE!)


DAMAGE TO FERN REDUCED TO 1!




WILLIS LOSES 1 HEALTH!

Tickles!!!

+


FINAL JAYSLOB SUFFERS 1 RECOIL DAMAGE!





>USE ITEM: BLACKLIGHT, DRINK

FERN SHONE THE BLACKLIGHT!

Creeping, ghostly shapes manifest wherever the ultraviolet light falls, raking their surroundings with unseen claws and gnashing aloud with unseen molars.

STAIN ROLL: 10 STAINS FOUND!

DAMAGE ROLL: 1, 3, 10, 7, 1,, 15, 20, 15, (3 STAINS STRIKE OPPONENT!) 11, 13, (2 STAINS STRIKE FERN!)


FERN SUFFERS 2 DAMAGE!




FINAL JAYSLOB SUFFERS 3 STAIN DAMAGE, 1 KIDNEY DAMAGE!




FERN:

Eugh...what even was that?!


WILLIS:

It was COOL! I want it if you don't!


FERN:

...I don't think this is something kids should play with...


WILLIS:

Come ooon, you've already got a weapon, and I've got WAY more hearts than you!!


FERN:

"Hearts?"


WILLIS:

Ugh, don't tell me you can't even see THOSE, either!!


FINAL JAYSLOB:

...nnnNNNNGGGGGGGGSSSSSsssssshhhh!!!!!


WILLIS:

...WHAT!?! Ew! Maybe YOUR mom!!!


WILLIS USED DRINK!

STRIKE ROLL: 12 (HIT!)

A bolt of pulsing veins strike the monstrosity in what might be a...mouth? You hope it's a mouth.


FINAL JAYSLOB LOSES 1/4 CURRENT HP (ROUNDED DOWN!) TO WILLIS!




WILLIS GAINED 5 HEALTH!

...Okay, that time it was...too salty...blech!

+


FINAL JAYSLOB USED SLOBBOMB!

A pair of unsettling, wet clots drop from the monster's churning center and begin to ORBIT its tangled feet like blood-soaked tumbleweeds



>FERN: Slash! WILLIS: Heal Fern!

FERN USED SLASH!

STRIKE ROLL: 17 (HIT!)

DAMAGE ROLL: 9, 3, 1, 5, 3, 15 (1 DAMAGE!)


WILLIS:

Ffferrrrn!!! Don't you have ANY base modlificators!?!


FERN:

Any whats!?


WILLIS:

If you're gonna fight stuff, we gotta get you set up right!!!


A SLOBBOMB HAS DETONATED!

DAMAGE ROLL (20d20): 4, 9, 2, 2, 9, 4, 6, 11, 13, 14, 14 (FERN HIT 4 TIMES!) 20, 20, 16, 16, 18, 15, 16, 18, 16, (9 HITS SPLIT BETWEEN WILLIS AND JAYSLOB - ROUNDED DOWN)




FINAL JAYSLOB USED BROKEN BASH vs. FERN!

STRIKE ROLL: 17+10 (HIT!)

DAMAGE ROLL: 4, 10, 9, 18, 13, 14, 20, 16 (5 DAMAGE!)


WILLIS SUSTAINS 4 SLOBBOMB DAMAGE!

+


FERN PASSES OUT!




FINAL JAYSLOB SUSTAINED 1 KIDNEY DAMAGE, 1 SLASHING DAMAGE, 4 SLOBBOMB DAMAGE AND 1 RECOIL DAMAGE THIS TURN!




WILLIS USED TRANSFUSE!

A network of veins, flickering in and out of perception, crackle through the air and entangle with Fern's CORE BRANCHES. If you could see what that looked like, it'd look pretty weird.

WILLIS LOSES 6 HEALTH!

+


FERN HEALS ALL DAMAGE!




FERN:

What just happened!??!


WILLIS:

You're so DEADABLE, Fern! Jeez! Almost anything can deadify you! Good thing TRANSFUSE always goes last in a combat round.


FERN:

"Combat round...?"


WILLIS:

Yeah, but careful! End combat at zero health and you'll have to fully respawn!


FERN:

Um...I don't really understand how that's real, but I'll take your word for it...



>WILLIS: SHIELD. FERN: SLASH.

WILLIS USED SHIELD!

Willis surrounds FERN in a tough, rubbery basket of arteries. All damage inflicted by or upon Willis and Fern reduced to ONE this turn!


FERN USED SLASH!

STRIKE ROLL: 20 (HIT!)

DAMAGE ROLL: 3, 8, 14 16, 16, 15 (REDUCED TO 1 DAMAGE!)


A SLOBBOMB HAS DETONATED!

DAMAGE ROLL (20d20): 13, 5, 13, 1, 10, 11, 12, 2, 4, 5, 9, 9, 15, 17, 20, 20, 20, 19, 18, 18, (DAMAGE TO WILLIS REDUCED TO 1 - JAYSLOB SUSTAINS 7 DAMAGE!)




FINAL JAYSLOB USED BROKEN BASH

STRIKE ROLL: 5+10 (HIT!)

DAMAGE ROLL: 7, 6, 10, 8, 12, 13, 18, 19 (REDUCED TO 1 DAMAGE!)


WILLIS SUSTAINS 1 SLOBBOMB DAMAGE!

+


FERN SUSTAINS 1 SLOBBOMB DAMAGE, 1 BASH DAMAGE!




FINAL JAYSLOB SUSTAINED 1 KIDNEY DAMAGE, 1 SLASHING DAMAGE, 7 SLOBBOMB DAMAGE AND 1 RECOIL DAMAGE THIS TURN!



Hooting mournfully, the tangled heap of a creature gushes something like chunky fruit preserves from the gnarled black pit at its center, wobbling even more shakily than usual.



>WILLIS: SHIELD. FERN: SLASH.

FERN USED SLASH!

Hmph...this thing's a pushover!

STRIKE ROLL: 11 (MISS!)

WILLIS:

....REALLY!?!


FERN:

Er...whoops?


...Tittering maniacally, the BABY KIDNEY STONE launches another of its crystalline thorns...



...The beast falls silent as the single, tiny sliver disappears into its pulsating flesh...


...Something deep within the creature
pops audibly...


...It wobbles...


...It creaks...






And then...........






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