Halloween '04
 I amassed FAR more than this for 2004's halloween season, but these are the weirdest/most humorous
finds. By humorous I mean completely boring and noone is ever going to read this. The rest was mainly
kitchenware and other household items.
Back
 This decoration, made in china, came from a liquidation store
for two dollars. The body wobbles and rocks very loosely on the
legs, holding (strangling?) what appears to be a gleefully happy
potato. Or it's Mr. Hankey. I don't know. I love its oafish
face...you KNOW this pumpkin probably speaks in the third
person. Very, very loudly.
 When the button on top is pressed, the mouth opens, the eyes
twist, and a tiny pellet of candy comes spiraling down the "brain"
and into the mouth. It's big, it's weird, and I found it at a flea
market.
 There isn't anything really absurd or interesting about these, but
I HAD to show them off. The one-eyed skele-cauldron is
wickedly creative. There was also a cat design, but I only got
these two.
If the little purple hat doesn't sell you, it also has googly eyes.
 From the same store and of the same material (some sort of
dried dough stuff) as the angry wobbling thing, this guy is just too
creepy looking for words. He reminds me a lot of a Blue Meanie,
even though he doesn't actually look anything like one. I just get
the feeling they would get along really well.
 The back of the package tells quite a tale, while the front
explains that once you grow your goblin (teehee), Halloween will
last forever. It's impossible to tell in my room, though.
 Smartie's answer to a Pez dispenser. These things are designed
to LAUNCH smarties clear across a room at high velocity,
which makes sense, because there's just nothing special about
smarties candy if it isn't dangerous. The launchers are also
designed to rattle when you shake them, but only the mummy
really works. They look pretty neat, though, especially with the
dripping blood design.
 The only really interesting pet toy I found this year. It's squeaky,
made from sturdy rubber and considerably larger than a baseball.
The bleeding eyes and worm make it exceptionally cute. I bought
a second one in case I need to juggle something.
            PUMPKIN PIE IS MADE OUT OF PEOPLE!!!

  Over nine inches tall with jiggling eyes, I'm not exactly sure if
you're supposed to be drink from this or put a candle in it.
 This came from Joann's and was simultaneously tied and glued
to a wavy metal candlestick...not really the best place for a cloth
doll. I cut him loose from that little fire hazard and hung him on
my wall.
 Now these are cool. Looking like something straight out of the
exorcist, they come in three varieties (though I only got this one)
and stand about four inches tall if you don't count all the troll hair.
When squeezed, their eyes light up and they emit several long,
piercing, hideous screams. Adorable.
 The crazed expression of this heavy, ceramic bobblehead can
easily distract you from the body, which the manufacturer
obviously recycled from their christmas products.

  A fitting way to end this year's gallery.
Angry Wobbling Pumpkin
"Brain Invader" Candy Dispenser
Creepy candleholders
Insane legless Cat
Evil Pumpkin Clown Thing
Growing Halloween Goblin
Kreepy Kliks
Mummy Ball
Psycho Pumpkin Chef
Pumpkin Ragdoll Thing
Pocket Screamer
Santa-Pumpkin
 Somehow I forgot to put these up until after my 2005 update...whoops!
This set of stretchy rubber bean-bags (a modern subclass of generic toy
that has taken the generic world by storm) appeared almost everywhere
toys were sold, sometimes for only a buck each! I'm not sure why the witch
is scaled so differently, but she's the only one that can stand up. A rat and a
spider were also included, but they were the same rat and spider sold
year-round with different tags. I think the werewolf is the most appealing,
and I'm usually rather indifferent to werewolves.
"STRETCH Horror Monsters"